Sunday, January 16, 2011

Chris Rock Social Security, Taxes and Insurance routine video

Chris Rockâ??s stand up comedy routine about Social Security, Taxes and Insurance is one of the most famous routines of the funny comedian.

Chris Rockâ??s stand up routine on Social Security, Taxes and Insurance was included on his Bigger and Blacker stand up comedy video, which premiered on July 10, 1999, being taped at the Appolo Theatre in Harlem.

Chris Rockâ??s stand up comedy DVD Bigger & Blacker was released one year later, on July 11, 2000 and is still one of his best comedy shows.

Talking about taxes and insurance, Chris Rock gives the audience a funny and interesting point of view about money payed for taxes...oh wait, like he says: â?? You don't even pay taxes. They take tax. You get your check, money gone.â??

You can watch FREE online Chris Rockâ??s stand up comedy routine about Social Security, Taxes and Insurance or you can watch the full video in our Stand Up Comedy Concerts.

Also, you will find the transcript of this funny routine culled from Chris Rockâ??s Bigger&Blacker video.

One thing Clinton did l didn't like,  raise taxes. Taxes all high and shit.

You know what's fucked-up about taxes? You don't even pay taxes. They take tax. You get your check, money gone. That ain't a payment, that's a jack.

Got all these taxes: city tax, state tax, Social Security tax. You don't get the money until you're. Meanwhile, the average black man dies at...Shit, we should get Social Security at! What the fuck, man? We don't live that long. Hypertension, high blood pressure, NYPD, something will get you.

What the fuck is up with the police? My God! l am scared. l didn't get rid of no guns. Fuck that shit. And l had a cop pull me over the other day,  scared me so bad...made me think l stole my own car. ''Get out the car, get out the fucking car! You stole this car!'' l'm like, ''Damn, maybe l did. ''Oh, Lord, l done stole a car.''

You know what's worse than taxes? What's worse than tax is insurance. You got to have some insurance. They shouldn't even call it insurance. They just should call it ''in case shit. l give a company some money in case shit happens. Now, if shit don't happen, shouldn't l get my money back? That's right, man, you better have some medical insurance, or you gonna die.

That's right, everybody. You got to eat right and exercise. No, you don't, you need some coverage. Coverage will save your life. That's right, we all gonna die, but at least if you got some coverage...you will die on a mattress. That's right. When l was a kid, we didn't have no insurance. We didn't have a damn thing.


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